still comfused.

gawsh.
i'M still confused about the whole Jarrod situation.
and now i'M a bit upset.
upset but happy...
upset because i think i'M falling for safwan.
but happy because of safwan.
we were playing dodgeball today for DPA,
and he hit me like twice and i missed him so many times...
but then i just got angry and tried to kick him,
then he just held my leg and started dragging me everywhere.
that weirdo, lol he sorta did that to tabitha...but yea.
that was pretty much the high light of my day.
and yesterday when we were going to class,
safwan too my hoodie and put it over my face...
then in class i gave him a dirty look,
next period came and i asked him if it was him who did that,
then he was like owh so that's the dirty look from math class, and he said no...
i didn't believe him so i just kept asking him throughout the whole day,
and then i hit him but he just laughed and he did that handshake with me,
the handshake he alwasy does with tom.
aahhh***melt-melt
owh yeah and during recess garth was randomly calling flus...
he went to Jarrod and was like owh you have the JAY FLU,
and he was like eew i have to get rid of that,
then garth said owh now you have the NADHIRAH FLU,
and Jarrod was like i'LL keep that.
but still other than that, no signs that he likes me.
Mahethan said Jarrod likes me a bit and really likes Tina,
but says Jarrod doesn't wanna hurt my feelings.
and i was like to him "aha! i knew it!"
but other people are like "owh he's in love with you."
but i don't believe them.
Mahethan i trust though, he's my awesome desk buddy.
Mahethan says he knoes that Dorcas likes him,
so he told me that he was gonna ask her to the dance,
and give her a chance, a chance that Yiping never gave.
now i'M closer to guys more than ever,
i just hug them and it's no big deal,
like i hug Yiping and others, and i absolutely love hugging people...

i had an awesome day dream about safwan today =P
so odd rite?
well here it is:
okay we just got out of class to recess,
and he gives me a piggy back ride onto the top of the hill,
then we start sitting and talking and laughing and everything,
i'M sitting on top of him then my face goes serious and sad,
he says "what's wrong?"
i go "well we have a half a year left together, then you'll be gone"
and he said "don't worry, we'll see each other everyday, we'll go eat out even on weekends."
and then i say "but what if you were all i wanted? what if you were all i really needed? and then you just leave me. you'll be gone and out of my life."
and safwan answers me looking deep into my eyes, "that won't because i don't love anyone else but you. i Love You Nadhirah"
then he hugs me and gives me a small peck, but i turn it into a passionate kiss.


THE END.
there will be more tonight...cuz i just got out of school.